I am...

...an average athlete. Or so I should be but really, I think I am awesome. I think I'm tough, I think I'm a tomboy/Jock. I've played sports since I was tiny kid. Cricket was the first. I remember dad teaching me to bowl and I just couldn't get it. I remember him trying really hard not to giggle, but I saw it! And I remember seeing the other boys bowl on their first go and thought, 'why can't I get it?" And so started the constant pushing of trying, and trying of different sports and no matter what, I don't really think I super excelled. But I had fun! 


I was one of those kids who always made the second 11 for cricket, hockey, tennis,soccer, and any other sport that looked like fun. But not quite good enough for the "First 11 team." Actually one year I did make it and I think I made it onto the cricket pitch twice in one season. But who cares? I got a gold badge and my photo in the year book! Awesome!!

I kind of realised that I was not going to be a prodigy at sports and I was totally ok with that from early childhood. I was known as the reliable team player who was there when a catch was to be made, there to take the dive for the ball and put her body in front (or once my head), there to tend to the one who got hit in the head with the cricket ball and stay with you until mum came and picked you up. And I was ok with that. I always got picked first for teams, and not because I was a "freaking legend" but because I gave it all my best, I pushed it, and every now and then I would hit a "4" or score a try during lunchtime rugby (which we played in our tartan skirts).

Anyway, I made it through high school and University mainly due to my love of sports. I looooooooove sports and I love running around like a 12 year old kid who's high on a massive sugar rush. I still feel 12 and I know I almost can look it some days! I just get pure excitement from moving, from sweating like a pig, from breathing and aching because you're carrying a pack that weighs half of you and it's rubbing into your hip bones because you've been carrying the thing in 32 degree heat for 5 days, because you like it!!! I go giggly, I relax, I like to play against the boys as they rough me up a bit and I have an excuse to push them over while they can't do it to me 'cause "I'm a teeny girl!" 

Below: Mary took this awesome photo: my first real outdoor lead...

So when I got introduced to climbing, I thought, "ok, another sport for Sarah to try. Probably won't be amazing at it but what the hell, try it!" Little did I know that after 28 years of searching I would find "the sport" that can numb my mind for 3-4hours. That can instantly put me into my Zen moment and completely block of all surrounding sounds that include an indoor gym packed full of other climbers. The only sound that my brain lets in every now and then is Kevin yelling "PUNCH IT SHEP!"


I think I'm doing good with climbing: I on-sited my first 10c overhung on lead after 1 week of learning how to lead climb so I think I'm doing ok. I have only been climbing for a year...oh, and did I mention that I love overhang? Oh, to be like a monkey and to be giggling so much due to all the fun that you practically laugh yourself of a climb is bliss! I see other experienced climbers around me and I am in awe and I want to be like them, breathe like them, and move like I am dancing up the wall....Ok, what I really want to do is to overtake Kevin's level, climb a really hard route perfectly that he is struggling on, and look down at him and go, "see honey? this is how you do it!" Oh, the pain that would rip through his face just brings me to such a happy place!! He knows this and I think he may be scared that I actually will do it! 


So with rock climbing (indoor and outdoor) comes bouldering. Now, this is where I can really be a monkey (no pun intended since I'm brown like one). Below is a boulder, just begging for me to climb it, and so I shall. The universe has sent these down to me with a mission saying, "climb me" and so I must!

Definition of bouldering thanks to Wiki: "Bouldering is a style of rock climbing undertaken without a rope and normally limited to very short climbs over a crash pad (called a bouldering mat) so that a fall will not result in serious injury (Yea right!!) It is typically practised on large natural boulders or artificial boulders in gyms and outdoor urban areas. However, it may also be practised at the base of larger rock faces, or even on buildings or public architecture"

And this is where the plot drastically changes. In the past few months I would hit the indoor gyms with Mary and The Kevinator, and in between my turn to climb when the 2 are belaying each other, I would head over the bouldering cave and muck about. And then I really started paying attention, grabbing some tips of the real legends there, and thought that I could really try and push this one. 
I love the fact that you can twist and bend, rotate, hang, swing, jump, do whatever to make the right moves to get up the route, and look really good doing it. Swinging from one hold to another while trying to crunch your abs up to heel lock your foot in some random shaped hold, and then practically lifting your entire body up is freaking amazing...and hard, and I am so not strong enough but I don't care because you see progress in yourself within 2 weeks worth of practise and there is always a route just for your level. 
Bliss!!

So, it's December 18 2010, we're at the gym and it's the end of our day. I think we had been climbing for about 4 hours or so. Anyway, I'm done climbing so to "warm down" I go and boulder. I see a new V1+ and it looks cool and I have to do it, and do it right the first time...because I like to set goals like that. (crazy...)

I walk up,  I pinch, I climb, I on-site. I looked at it for 5 seconds on the floor, went "meh, lets see how this goes" and got it. I'm at the top and my forearms look like Popeyes post Spinach OD. I'm sweating like a pig because it was grunty and I'm shaking from pure joy and buggerness. So I just kind of let go...Totally forgetting that I'm 8 feet high and yes there are gym mats underneath but forgetting that sometimes gravity isn't so nice to you. Heard a loud crack/pop noise, instant pain and sat there looking up thinking, "um, that's not good?"
The dude next to me is yelling, "hey you got the route, you rock!" And I'm trying really hard not to look at him because if I do he'll see that I'm really not that tough and so want to cry but won't because I'm in public and there are kids around who'll laugh at me...Yup, I'm that immature!

I look over to Kevin who's belaying Mary and mouthing to me "nice job!" and then the smile goes from shock to, "why won't she talk to me and tell me what's wrong?" Again, fear of crying in public leads to me making a squealing sound to Kevin in collaboration with bulging eyes. Mary and Kev shoot over and then things go a little bit blurry. I won't go into too much deal as I have rambled enough already, but we shoot off to Lions Gate Hospital in the ever so trusty Subaru (Suuubaaarooooo)...will not bitch too much about that ER, but coming from 3 ICU RNs, "that was crap service" Told, "it's not broken (post x-ray), just a really bad sprain. You'll be walking tomorrow"

I give my love to the 2 of them as they sat by my side during the 4+ hours we spent in that room, listening to the Chinese exchange student harping on about how much he wants "Gravol", that he wants it pushed and not in a drip, and bla, bla, bla, and then near the end of our wait I get asked, "oh, you must be sore, need some pain relief?" The best was on my actual notes: quote, "pain scale, not obtained by patient" Um, I've come in saying "owe, me knee" 

Ok, enough moaning. Next day, Squamish General Hospital: LEGENDS!! Get fast -tracked to see an orthopod surgeon, and the journey starts.

3 months since the accident. Things that have happened to me:
(1) radiology lost my MRI Rec: We ask one of our ICU Docs to write one out for me and that day (In Jan 2011) I get my MRI because the clerks recognise me from the unit, squeeze me in, I buy them all chocolates, everyone is happy.
(2) The surgeon didn't get my file..we make up a new one
(3) Hospital Occ Health are making me cry...I make them cry...everyone is happy
(4) I am now stuck to walking 4 blocks before my knee swells up. My shiny, brand new, custom fit ski bots and new skis get up in the rafters...never to be used this season...Kevin and Mary are off ice climbing and I should be with them...Sarah is not happy

*MRI RESULT: FULL ACL TEAR, PARTIAL MCL, PROMINENT MEDIAL MENISCUS TEAR...severe bone marrow oedema* 

I'm soooooo hard core! 

(5) I join the local woman's gym, work out next to one of the "Loggers Day" ladies and loose 10 pounds! Happy and toned!
(6) Employment insurance has not kicked in, I can only work part time in research (no nursing duties for many, many months), all sick time used up, and then I get laid off from research...2 days later I get a new research job, a promotion title, and I think my moods are a gong show!
(7) surgery gets expedited: moved onto another surgeon because the first one went to Calgary who sent me to the second one who wanted to wait another 3 months, who got pissed off when the third one stepped in and said "no, she shouldn't wait, she needs it now"


Yup, quite the ride...
So it's the night before surgery. Kevin has brought me 2 mini cupcakes and I am every so thankful. 


Apparently the surgery is kind of big. "it's a knee for Godsake, how bad can it be?" I say to my new Surgeon Dr. Zarkadas who is super cool. "Um, Sarah, we're going to take one of your 4 hamstrings, we're going to drill two holes into different parts of the bone, were going to thread that hamstring through the holes, screw them in" Oh, so that bad? Huh...


I work in the ICU, what do I know? I do know what drugs I will be recommending to my anaesthetist, reasons so, and the dosage. Therefore, I went and did many literature searches on ACL repair, surgery techniques, acute vs. chronic treatment, post-op rehab, etc. What did I find? That this is a common injury amongst elite athletes! That's right baby! I, the average try-hard, wannabe hard core athlete has an "elite athletes" injury! Playing with the big boys now! 

The sexy knees: (the one that looks kinda wonky under CCC sign is the crap one!!)

Pre knee shots: Oh, and I measured my thigh as apparently I'm going to get quite bad atrophy... 17inches mid thigh... Will keep an eye on this.


My physio, by the way, is God. I want to marry him. Kevin wants to marry him. We love him. 

Plan for me for the first week:
* Walk - slow weight bearing on crutches but get on your feet
* every hour for 20 mins, range of motion exercises
* Cryocuff every 2-3 hours
* straighten that leg! Do all you can to straighten it. Super crucial. If full extension is not completed in the first month I am high risk of a second surgery to re-straighten it...do not want this! 
*milk as much chocolates and flowers from Kevin as I can...diamond centred chocolates, of course.
* be calm, be slow, be ok with the fact that this is going to be a really long and tedious 6 months of rehab. But just be thankful...